If my subjects were my children.

After the first week of lectures, I have profiled each of my subjects as if they were my children.

I recommend you do the same – it’s fun.

Corporate Writing is the eldest child. He is sensible, well groomed and intelligent. He knows exactly what he wants to be, and works hard to be it. He thinks before he speaks, washes his hands before every meal and brushes his teeth twice a day, every day. Protective and loving, he is the kind of man you want your daughter hanging around.

Strategic Speech Communication is impeccably intelligent, less upright and less restrained than her older brother. She speaks with great wit and holds herself with dignity, but will drop her behavior to be cool and relevant should the social situation call for it. She will never back down from an argument, and can talk her way out of anything. I love her the most.

Media Communication Industries is the typical third child. A jack of all trades, but a master of none. He swings between being down to earth and insane, responsible and careless. He will lock himself in his room and noone is sure whether he is doing homework, or hacking company networks.

(Out of respect, I have made some subtle edits to the next paragraph. Don’t worry – they’re not too obvious.)

Poetry – the youngest and ugliest alternate looking of the quartet.
He paints the carpet, takes his pants off outside, burns the curtains and drinks the jar of Seamonkeys. He’s different from the rest. A child who is hard to love interesting. He’s an okay kid. Not my favourite, but he’ll do.*

* I’m not saying that poetry is a bad subject.**

** Really, it’s not awful, it’s just not my subject of choice. I encourage implore you to sign up for poetry though. You may love it***, despite the fact I don’t. You should all register for a class right now.

*** You MAY love it. I’m not saying you will – but you might. You never know unless you try.

I’m sorry Poetry.
I hope I don’t lose marks for this.

3 responses

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  1. Avatar
    Beth

    My parents always said you should never have favourites.

    But Strategic Speech is pretty awesome.

  2. Avatar
    Monique

    Good blog Tim! Funny. I’m digging Corporate Writing also. But it’s making me self-concious about everything I write now!

  3. Avatar
    Sharon

    I LOVE your blogs Tim! It’s about time you wrote another one 🙂

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